The Last Church in America

Outrageous satire on (dis)organized religion.

The Last Church in America might refer to the First Elderian Church of Pugh: geographically located on the edge of a Midwest dimple in an otherwise deserted town, whose zany resident-worshippers occupy themselves with shrinking supplies (especially of peas and pearl onions), shooting at strangers who come to offer them food, or throwing themselves into an upheaval over the curse of Jeconiah.

OR…The Last Church in America might refer to the peculiar strangers who live across the valley from Pugh, a community referred to by themselves as “the Fellowship” and by others as the “foothill fanatics,” heathens of the worse kind.

OR…The Last Church in America might refer to the Church of Cosmic Control, those living in the valley, whose focus is an ancient totem pole and who always agree that any stumbling blocks must be thrown onto the trash heap of religious history.

Their leader is Dr. Harold Harrington Honeywell III, who was a leading U.S. Presidential candidate until he showed up at his party's nominating convention wearing nothing but a beaded Indian loincloth.

All three groups — reflecting competing viewpoints — struggle to survive following the Decline, a time in America’s near future when everything (food, communications, power) simply grinds to a halt. Fighting tradition, paranoia or substance abuse, the communal triangle of this not-so-brave new world engages in ludicrous cat-and-mouse games by either force or necessity.

Bart Kenlow, a desperate young pastor from Pugh, unavoidably becomes trapped by centuries-old protocol. He finally flees his barbed-wire perimeter, holding hostage the only copy of the Elderian Book of Procedure — a venerated volume for which his colleagues will do anything to get back.

Can he trust those offering help from the foothills? Will he disappear within the canvas walls of Dr. H.’s quaking blue pyramid? What cosmic forces could combat an armed attack? Is it the dawn of a new day, or is the Age of Aquarius further away than they think? Are all these characters hypocrites, holy, or just plain crazy?

The Last Church in America weaves a hair-trigger tale of bizarre events, offering up sacred cows of disorganized religion on a fiery altar of outrageous satire.